[It wells up in Eren as Maruki speaks, this devastating admiration. Of course, Maruki would break him apart, put him back together, place him back in his own two hands - that is, after all, what he's always done.
[Eren believes every word Maruki says. He believes that he's beautiful when Maruki is the one looking at him. His eyes, or his passion, or the tacky blood on the bottom of his boots - his Other loves them all, and it's so easy. It would surprise Maruki's other friends, Eren thinks, to know he dreams of the same empty world, perfect in its ruin.
[Will they fill it with gold wherever they pass?
[Eren's hands both squeeze the stone, release, squeeze, and he hasn't even looked at it again. He's looking at Maruki.]
I trust you.
[His voice sounds weak. His arms curl in, stone still enclosed, pressed into his chest. He doesn't know what to say. And why should he have to say anything? Maruki wouldn't make him. Eren's arms loop back around the man's neck, and then he's folded into him again, hands still loosely grasping the stone.]
I'll keep it with me. All the time. I'll...enchant it or something. [His voice goes tight. Really, he doesn't even try to hold it back.] I can't ever lose it...
[ Maruki takes him into his arms gladly, gratefully. It feels impossible that he could ever find anything for Eren as meaningful as that glass from Eyn Sof, but he's tried his best, and it seems to have worked.
They're still intertwined where they sit on the floor, and Maruki only draws him in closer, practically bringing Eren into his lap. He leans the side of his head against Eren's, hums quietly. ]
You won't ever lose it. I know that. I trust you.
[ One hand scratches fondly up and down his spine as he keeps him in that close embrace. It's okay if Eren cries again, but Maruki only wants them to be happy tears now. ]
There's one other thing, but– take your time. Only when you're ready.
[ Slowly, Maruki unwraps his arms from around Eren to take his face in both hands.
It's quiet in the windmill. That's the best thing about it, really. Even when the rest of the world is in chaos, they have this one retreat, a microcosm of the perfect silence that will fall over their empty world.
There's so much he could say now. The day of his favorite person's birth, his heart still beating a year past its expiration date – Maruki could tell him at length just how much he's loved him, for how long, for how far into the future of so many other lives that that love will carry on. He could talk to Eren for hours. Talk about Eren for hours. One day, he'd love nothing more than to seize the opportunity to lay out every single thing he admires about him, even if it overwhelms Eren to hear.
But there's something else Eren deserves to know, and it transcends anything he could hope to put into words in any reality.
His thumbs stroke over Eren's cheekbones, wiping away residual dampness. His fingers against Eren's jaw flex and release, again and again. His eyes rove slowly over every inch of that open, wondering face, a smile spreading slowly across his own like a droplet of blood dissipating in warm water.
And then, he does what he's only done once before–
Maruki draws him in to capture his lips in a kiss. It's not unsure or hesitant at all; it's as solid as it is tender, absolutely unwavering in its conviction.
Eren has been nothing less than perfectly patient with him, and every time Maruki has wanted to kiss him and held himself back comes through now. He tips his Other's head to press in closer, the barest edge of teeth set against his lower lip, a soft inhale as he doesn't let go. It won't be the last kiss he gives Eren now, and it isn't the first, but hopefully– hopefully, it's the best. ]
[It's just different, being kissed by someone. Eren remembers lying awake at night, wrapped up in Mikasa's arms. He tried to think of ways he could convince her - that he was ready, that he was him, that it was all they had, so why - but she walled herself off, kept herself away.
[It ripped him apart. He never forgot. At least Maruki will accept a kiss behind closed doors, in the safety of this windmill - it never hurt Eren that he didn't take them first, but...
[It really is just different, being kissed. Not kissing. Being kissed. Being kissed on his birthday, by the person he loves more than he's ever loved anyone else. He finds himself gripping Maruki by the shoulders - too tight, maybe. He breaks away just to stare at him - just to make sure...
[His hands find his Other's face; Eren holds it, tenderly, carefully - so, so carefully.]
[ They're both holding one another's faces now, as gingerly as if they were the shattered ceramic themselves.
It never stops being his favorite thing to hear. It never stops surprising him, either, even with everything they've spoken of and experienced. Even with everything to come in the next life, the next reality...
Maruki thumbs at his cheeks, warm smile evident in his gaze even though the rest of his expression is serious, earnest. ]
I can't... I don't think I'll ever be able to put the way I love you into words, as much as I've tried. And I'll keep trying! But...
[ He closes that distance between them again, just enough to brush their noses together. ]
It comes across easier if I can show you.
[ Get kissed again, Eren Jaeger.
So long as they're in here, he has no intention of stopping himself ever again. ]
[Eren's lips are taken again, and so is he. His hands linger on Maruki's face, but his legs yank them closer together. Eren feels a painful urgency, the need to be closer. Show you. He wants to show Maruki too.
[One hand shifts up, curls gently around locks of Maruki's hair. The other hand slips down, all the way to his ribs. Eren slips his tongue warmly between Maruki's lips.]
Much more than they've done before. It isn't a bad thing, not at all, but it does make his heart skip several beats all at once, his breath catch in his chest, his face burn with a furious blush.
He allows that soft intrusion, parts his own lips to respond in kind, the motion tentative. It's new, tasting Eren like this, gently exploring– and even though their bodies are pressed close as can be, he does let one hand drift down to tuck in between them, palm flat against Eren's chest. It doesn't mean stop, but it does mean no more than this, please, and he hopes his Other can read that. ]
[Eren does stop when he feels that light pressure on his chest, but only for a second. He hovers an inch or so away from Maruki's face, the softest little smile on his lips - just barely there, as ever, but there, as it so rarely is.
[Eren rests his hand over the hand Maruki has laid on his chest. With his other hand, he smooths the man's hair back at his left temple. Eren leans in again, and repeats that soft, gentle intrusion - no more. His thumb strokes a tender line over Maruki's knuckles.]
[ It's such a profound relief– not only being able to do this, but to approach it at his own pace, to never be pushed faster or farther than his heart can allow. Leave it to the person who knows him down to the depths of his soul to understand what he needs without so much as a word spoken between them...
The next time that slow, gentle exploration of a kiss breaks, Maruki slides his free hand around to cup Eren's nape, anchoring and protective as ever. He's fairly breathless even without any frantic heat between them, and he can feel the warmth in his cheeks as he pulls back to be able to look Eren in the eye. ]
I can't wait to celebrate your day in every reality, but I have a feeling this will always be my favorite one. Happy birthday, Eren.
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no subject
[Eren believes every word Maruki says. He believes that he's beautiful when Maruki is the one looking at him. His eyes, or his passion, or the tacky blood on the bottom of his boots - his Other loves them all, and it's so easy. It would surprise Maruki's other friends, Eren thinks, to know he dreams of the same empty world, perfect in its ruin.
[Will they fill it with gold wherever they pass?
[Eren's hands both squeeze the stone, release, squeeze, and he hasn't even looked at it again. He's looking at Maruki.]
I trust you.
[His voice sounds weak. His arms curl in, stone still enclosed, pressed into his chest. He doesn't know what to say. And why should he have to say anything? Maruki wouldn't make him. Eren's arms loop back around the man's neck, and then he's folded into him again, hands still loosely grasping the stone.]
I'll keep it with me. All the time. I'll...enchant it or something. [His voice goes tight. Really, he doesn't even try to hold it back.] I can't ever lose it...
no subject
They're still intertwined where they sit on the floor, and Maruki only draws him in closer, practically bringing Eren into his lap. He leans the side of his head against Eren's, hums quietly. ]
You won't ever lose it. I know that. I trust you.
[ One hand scratches fondly up and down his spine as he keeps him in that close embrace. It's okay if Eren cries again, but Maruki only wants them to be happy tears now. ]
There's one other thing, but– take your time. Only when you're ready.
no subject
There's more? What else could you have done?
[It's funny - he's half-crying already, all the while looking as incredulous and overwhelmed as if he were just handed pure gold--
[Well.]
not that pitiful FACE
Do you have any guesses?
no subject
no subject
It's quiet in the windmill. That's the best thing about it, really. Even when the rest of the world is in chaos, they have this one retreat, a microcosm of the perfect silence that will fall over their empty world.
There's so much he could say now. The day of his favorite person's birth, his heart still beating a year past its expiration date – Maruki could tell him at length just how much he's loved him, for how long, for how far into the future of so many other lives that that love will carry on. He could talk to Eren for hours. Talk about Eren for hours. One day, he'd love nothing more than to seize the opportunity to lay out every single thing he admires about him, even if it overwhelms Eren to hear.
But there's something else Eren deserves to know, and it transcends anything he could hope to put into words in any reality.
His thumbs stroke over Eren's cheekbones, wiping away residual dampness. His fingers against Eren's jaw flex and release, again and again. His eyes rove slowly over every inch of that open, wondering face, a smile spreading slowly across his own like a droplet of blood dissipating in warm water.
And then, he does what he's only done once before–
Maruki draws him in to capture his lips in a kiss. It's not unsure or hesitant at all; it's as solid as it is tender, absolutely unwavering in its conviction.
Eren has been nothing less than perfectly patient with him, and every time Maruki has wanted to kiss him and held himself back comes through now. He tips his Other's head to press in closer, the barest edge of teeth set against his lower lip, a soft inhale as he doesn't let go. It won't be the last kiss he gives Eren now, and it isn't the first, but hopefully– hopefully, it's the best. ]
:WHYYYYYYYYY:
[It ripped him apart. He never forgot. At least Maruki will accept a kiss behind closed doors, in the safety of this windmill - it never hurt Eren that he didn't take them first, but...
[It really is just different, being kissed. Not kissing. Being kissed. Being kissed on his birthday, by the person he loves more than he's ever loved anyone else. He finds himself gripping Maruki by the shoulders - too tight, maybe. He breaks away just to stare at him - just to make sure...
[His hands find his Other's face; Eren holds it, tenderly, carefully - so, so carefully.]
Takuto. I love you...
no subject
It never stops being his favorite thing to hear. It never stops surprising him, either, even with everything they've spoken of and experienced. Even with everything to come in the next life, the next reality...
Maruki thumbs at his cheeks, warm smile evident in his gaze even though the rest of his expression is serious, earnest. ]
I can't... I don't think I'll ever be able to put the way I love you into words, as much as I've tried. And I'll keep trying! But...
[ He closes that distance between them again, just enough to brush their noses together. ]
It comes across easier if I can show you.
[ Get kissed again, Eren Jaeger.
So long as they're in here, he has no intention of stopping himself ever again. ]
inb4 lexy
[One hand shifts up, curls gently around locks of Maruki's hair. The other hand slips down, all the way to his ribs. Eren slips his tongue warmly between Maruki's lips.]
no subject
Much more than they've done before. It isn't a bad thing, not at all, but it does make his heart skip several beats all at once, his breath catch in his chest, his face burn with a furious blush.
He allows that soft intrusion, parts his own lips to respond in kind, the motion tentative. It's new, tasting Eren like this, gently exploring– and even though their bodies are pressed close as can be, he does let one hand drift down to tuck in between them, palm flat against Eren's chest. It doesn't mean stop, but it does mean no more than this, please, and he hopes his Other can read that. ]
ohhhhh not this icon in laby tho
[Eren rests his hand over the hand Maruki has laid on his chest. With his other hand, he smooths the man's hair back at his left temple. Eren leans in again, and repeats that soft, gentle intrusion - no more. His thumb strokes a tender line over Maruki's knuckles.]
no subject
The next time that slow, gentle exploration of a kiss breaks, Maruki slides his free hand around to cup Eren's nape, anchoring and protective as ever. He's fairly breathless even without any frantic heat between them, and he can feel the warmth in his cheeks as he pulls back to be able to look Eren in the eye. ]
I can't wait to celebrate your day in every reality, but I have a feeling this will always be my favorite one. Happy birthday, Eren.