[Eren's never really used words like "dating," considering he rarely goes on dates, and never would have had even one singular chance to back in his true reality. He took to calling people that he actually kissed or would consider marrying his "partners" after people in this reality demanded that he start defining everything. The truth is, when he loves someone, he simply loves them, but others don't tend to work that way. People want to know what they are to each other, and he and Dolph have certainly realized that they are something they perhaps weren't before.
[He gets it. He tries to.]
We kissed. We decided to have our happiness with each other. That would make him another partner of mine, I guess.
It's like I said, though...when it comes to that sort of thing, I'd rather have you approval before moving forward again. Like you gave me with Dolph.
I think that I do. It's difficult for me, but that's not because of the way you've explained it, or anything you've done.
[ He has to wonder if Eren realizes he is Maruki's first foray into this gray area between the stark black and white. The roles are entirely reversed; Eren is more of a guide than ever before. ]
What if you're interested in someone and I haven't approved of them? I don't want to control you...
I know. [He knows. He knows that Maruki is the last person in any reality that would ever want to put Eren under his thumb, but he's also the only one that Eren would allow to do so gladly. It's complex...]
You wouldn't try to keep me away from anyone I cared about. I know that too.
That's all that really matters. Whether I kiss someone, or marry someone, or go further - that doesn't really matter either.
[. . .]
But it might matter to you. [It mattered to Mikasa. He should have given her this too. He's a man built from regret.] Because you're different than me, in that way.
So...if it matters to you, but it doesn't matter to me, then...I don't mind.
I just want to be close to the people I care about while I can. You know that.
[ Some breath that's been held for hours, unbeknownst to Maruki, is suddenly released. He feels his whole body relax into it, any last tension in his shoulders dissipating.
It does matter to him.
It matters to him more than Eren will ever be able to know–
But he knows Maruki well enough to know that it does matter, and that alone does all the heavy lifting.
He wriggles his arms free again to frame Eren's face in both hands, holds his gaze. His Other. Does he know how good he is? Maruki doubts it. ]
Thank you. Eren.
[ Fingertips trace up along his hairline, through the stray hairs come loose from his bun. ]
If you find yourself wondering if I would approve of someone, and waiting to see if I say something first... Just tell me. I want to know.
[ He may not always notice the way that he did with Dolph. That's a special case; there's no other combination of people in this reality he would have felt comfortable inserting himself in the middle of to give his blessing. And if he hadn't preempted it, this conversation – this important, sacred conversation never would have happened. ]
I'll always be honest with you about how I feel. I promise.
[ And for the first time, Maruki believes that. Wholly and completely, without the tiniest sliver of doubt peeking into the edges of his mind. They were nearly there before, it was only his own confusion keeping him from trusting the truth of that with his whole heart–
But he gets it now. He does. ]
There aren't words for it.
[ His eyebrows lift as he smiles at Eren, thumbs brushing at the corners of his lips in case they turn upwards again too. ]
So... you should kiss me instead.
okay well get absolutely eren'd - THREE USES OF THIS ICON IN ONE THREAD
[They've kissed before. Eren thinks they've probably kissed in a hundred different realities, at least, but he's not sure that Maruki has ever asked for it quite so plainly in any one of them.
[Eren's smile bleeds, warm, into his features. Yes, he kisses him. Yes, of course, he kisses him - kisses him, kisses him, kisses him, kisses him.]
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no subject
What surprised you?
no subject
I didn't understand why you would care that much about my opinion on who you... date– wait, are you and Dolph actually dating? Did that happen?
[ Forgive him for his black and white worldview between platonic and romantic. ]
no subject
[He gets it. He tries to.]
We kissed. We decided to have our happiness with each other. That would make him another partner of mine, I guess.
It's like I said, though...when it comes to that sort of thing, I'd rather have you approval before moving forward again. Like you gave me with Dolph.
That meant a lot to me.
You get it now, at least, right?
no subject
[ A beat. ]
I think that I do. It's difficult for me, but that's not because of the way you've explained it, or anything you've done.
[ He has to wonder if Eren realizes he is Maruki's first foray into this gray area between the stark black and white. The roles are entirely reversed; Eren is more of a guide than ever before. ]
What if you're interested in someone and I haven't approved of them? I don't want to control you...
no subject
You wouldn't try to keep me away from anyone I cared about. I know that too.
That's all that really matters. Whether I kiss someone, or marry someone, or go further - that doesn't really matter either.
[. . .]
But it might matter to you. [It mattered to Mikasa. He should have given her this too. He's a man built from regret.] Because you're different than me, in that way.
So...if it matters to you, but it doesn't matter to me, then...I don't mind.
I just want to be close to the people I care about while I can. You know that.
no subject
It does matter to him.
It matters to him more than Eren will ever be able to know–
But he knows Maruki well enough to know that it does matter, and that alone does all the heavy lifting.
He wriggles his arms free again to frame Eren's face in both hands, holds his gaze. His Other. Does he know how good he is? Maruki doubts it. ]
Thank you. Eren.
[ Fingertips trace up along his hairline, through the stray hairs come loose from his bun. ]
Can you promise me one more thing?
no subject
Of course. I'll promise you anything. Takuto.
no subject
[ He may not always notice the way that he did with Dolph. That's a special case; there's no other combination of people in this reality he would have felt comfortable inserting himself in the middle of to give his blessing. And if he hadn't preempted it, this conversation – this important, sacred conversation never would have happened. ]
I'll always be honest with you about how I feel. I promise.
no subject
[To Eren, he's perfect. He's absolutely perfect in absolutely every way.]
I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anything.
no subject
But he gets it now. He does. ]
There aren't words for it.
[ His eyebrows lift as he smiles at Eren, thumbs brushing at the corners of his lips in case they turn upwards again too. ]
So... you should kiss me instead.
okay well get absolutely eren'd - THREE USES OF THIS ICON IN ONE THREAD
[Eren's smile bleeds, warm, into his features. Yes, he kisses him. Yes, of course, he kisses him - kisses him, kisses him, kisses him, kisses him.]
That...
[Kisses him, kisses him, kisses him...]
...makes me happier than anything.