[Maruki is right. This isn't about him, and even Eren knows that. Maybe he only wanted to set the record straight, to somehow exonerate Levi. But he believes that Maruki didn't hate Levi, because that's what Maruki says. He understands. Of course he does.
[Eren is free to be. A familiar, hideous thought rears its head, and Eren speaks it, because he's allowed to.]
I wish he'd really killed me.
[At some point, giving voice to those thoughts became useless; now, he's told Maruki that he doesn't want to die anymore, and he still means that.
[But he still wishes Levi had killed him. He wishes he'd had that revenge. It would have only been temporary, but it would have been what he was owed.]
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[Eren is free to be. A familiar, hideous thought rears its head, and Eren speaks it, because he's allowed to.]
I wish he'd really killed me.
[At some point, giving voice to those thoughts became useless; now, he's told Maruki that he doesn't want to die anymore, and he still means that.
[But he still wishes Levi had killed him. He wishes he'd had that revenge. It would have only been temporary, but it would have been what he was owed.]