abandonhumanity | PSL / MEME CONTINUATION

That doesn’t help Alert :))))
Alret
Arlerlt
Fuck it

Who’s the friennnnnd

[Is he allowed to talk about this?]

You know Annie. Leonhart? We all went to high school together. She did ROTC with Eren.

[His face is on fire. He's glad Annie is sleeping. It's kind of a "there's a cat purring in your lap and you dare not move an inch in case you scare it away" kind of scenario, hence his own wakefulness.]

[A tiny Eren with little red devil wings lands on Aubrey's left shoulder. "You have got to bust his balls for this," he says. Likewise, a tiny Eren with big fluffy angel wings lands on her right shoulder. "He's right. You have got to bust his balls for this."]

[Both tiny shoulder Erens are getting a hearty fistbump. ~~[S] Bust balls.~~]

OMG how did I not guess
You only made 😍😍😍 @her every spare minute don’t think no one notice
d

[No… this won’t do. She must add detail.]

Like remember that one time someone went around leaving “secret admiration” letters
S2G you lit up like a siren every time lion girl passed you for weeks it was like
Get a room!!!!!
It took some years but congrats!!!!!!!! 🎉🎉🎉💕

[Eren would probably be meaner~~, and it’s not like Aubrey can talk about being blush-prone~~, but… genuinely. She’s happy for the guy! The guy and his kinda-weird distant loner gf!]

I didn't do those things!

[He may have done those things. ~~He did those things.~~]

Well, I liked her, of course, but I didn't act like some lovesick puppy or anything!

We've been friends a long time is all. That's all we are now too.

[...]

Nothing official, you know?

[~~But did he do her—~~]

“ I didn't act like some lovesick puppy or anything! We’ve” aww your just missing a “baka” <3 [Ongoing Queen of Having Absolutely No Place To Talk.]

BFFS wide awake at 3 AM for platonic reasons I see how it is :)
Ill keep your secret if you insist
But your not fooling anyone :)
[Got damn is it annoying to be a serious menace when autocorrect keeps using the wrong “you’re.”]

You are drunk.

I’m not trying to fool anyone. All I meant is that this was unexpected, and as far as I know we aren’t anything other than friends - officially.

Also, she’s asleep right now.

You figured it out 🌟
[He almost certainly knew two messages into this exchange, if even that.]

“officially.” :)
That’s so godforesaken cute [she meant “goddamn” but whatever] you and your sleepy lion girl zzzz

Wait
Is she your “plans”

My plans involve spending time with her, yes. I was invited to a Halloween party.

Oh no fucking way

Not the costume party at the [and here we suffer for Omori’s lack of surnames, but it’s one Armin might faintly recognize as belonging to a kid a couple grades down. Aubrey used to hang out with him a lot.] house???.?

The very same…

Why…?

Kill
Me
LMAOOO you are never gonna believed what bridges are in fire tonight

[Ha! Ha ha! ha! This is! fantastic! She’s so! glad! she texted Armin at ass-o-clock in the morning! and can’t sleep! and has no hope of it now!!!!1!]

Ur gonna hear Kim bitching about me sooooo much 💀
[Kim being, for the record, a punk from a grade down (not the kid whose house it is, but close to him) who’s always seemed to like Aubrey. Like-like Aubrey. On account of Eren it has never gone anywhere.
[Armin may or may not be privvy to that whole mess, but Aubrey proceeds as if he is entirely in-the-know anyway.]
She asked me to match costumes it was gonna be this whole thiiiiiiiinng
You’d think I was breaking up with her she took it so shit lmfao
But like
Do I blame her
🙃

Listen if you see her

[A pause, in the rapidfire.]

Eren

That’s it you know how it fucking is

I can tell you're upset.

Do you want to talk about it?

[Because he does understand (to an extent) the Kim situation, but what he understands infinitely more is that when Eren is in town, he sees whoever he wants, whenever he wants, regardless of what their plans are, and 90% of the people he wants to see are Aubrey.

[There's no way this could have been avoided. He can't even pretend to give advice.]

Maybe it won't be so bad.

Ugh you know how it is
Same shit different day

[Which isn’t a no, but, come on. They’ve been over The Eren Situation to hell and back, and Armin’s trying to have a nice night with his totally-not-girlfriend. Sure, a few details are new, and there’s this nagging feeling this might really be a point of no return (in what way, hell if Aubrey knows), but it’s all just a fresh saddle on the same zombified horse.

[…Right?]

Ill be fine I just need to sleep

Your right it could be worse
Just gonna be a sedimentary weekend and then he goes back
* Sentiment
Al
And as usual we [ha, ha ha, “we”] just get to clean up the rest

[There’s a slight temptation to mention who (derogatory) Eren will be going back to, in case Armin has yet to be enlightened on that front… but, uh, not tonight. Poor guy’s been interrupted enough.]

And then he goes back, and we get to clean up the mess.

I get you. It sucks.

I do hope I get to see him though. It's been a while.

Sure does

A while?
Like since he moved or ?
[Huh. Yeah, it is a little weird that Armin didn’t know about this visit, isn’t it…?]

No, I've seen him since he moved.

[One particularly bad fight with Aubrey had Armin driving three hours in the middle of the night-- Didn't that happen twice?]

Not in several months, though. I mean, he's never here. And I can't just drop everything and drive to Marley every time I want to see him.

That's just how things are now, I guess.

[Twice. Sounds about right. Very possible Aubrey’s aware that Armin made those trips, albeit in a distant ‘this is what happens after we fight and I can’t console Eren’ way; she’s too drained to recall the specifics for the moment.]

Suuuure fucking is
You’d think he’s trying to get far away as humanly possible
Which fine whatever [it would, of course, not be fine with her at all]
But it’s not like he’s moving on

[Eren is trying to get as far away as humanly possible - he's talked about going even farther. Still, Armin doesn't necessarily want to dredge that up while she's drunk and upset. Either way, she's right about one thing. He's definitely not moving on...Armin doesn't think he ever will. Eren's not the type to let go of anything - love or a grudge, and Aubrey is both.]

All we can do is try to be there for him until he does decide to come home. You can lead a horse to water, etc., etc...

He just has to work out whatever's going on with himself until it's done. I guess. I don't know...

I don’t know if hell ever be done TBH
[Or, well, there’s one way. It’s one none of them, Armin or Mikasa or Aubrey, can let happen.]
The funny thing is I bet he’d come back if I said so
Just

[Wait. Wait. No, noooo, she didn’t want to kick up this spiral again.]

[After a significant pause:]
Sorry for the downer
We’ll see
You have fun at that party and if he tries to interrupt
just shoot
I’ll
Take care of him

Aubrey.

I mean this with love, but don't get back together with Eren.

[Armin's not sure Eren would survive it. Armin's not sure either of them would.]

That's all I'll say. I know it isn't any of my business. I just care about you. Both of you.

[Aubrey has a headache.]

[But then he’d be home backspace that What if it keeps him ali oh god definitely don’t send that What’s the differential first of all wrong word, second, not getting into that right now either; I miss h No. No!]

[ … ]

We care about you too Armin
[—“We.”]
[Fuck her life.]

Well

Eye of the storm
Wish me luck

[Aubrey and Eren have been "we" for a long time now. He loves them both painfully.]

Get some rest.

🤞

[It was supposed to be a ✌️.]

[She crashes immediately.]

PSL / MEME CONTINUATION

let him out!!!

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crowd applauding at armin wearing a little hat

👏👏👏👏👏 (it’s me im crowd)

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