abandonhumanity: (65)
Eren Jaeger ([personal profile] abandonhumanity) wrote 2024-10-10 01:26 am (UTC)

WE CAN SNACK WRAP UNLESS U HAVE MORE

[They do. Eren knows they do. That makes it worse, maybe. Or maybe it would be worse if they only hated them, if they didn't love him at all. There's no right answer. It hurts to be loved by them, it hurts to be hated by them, it hurts not to have them now, and it would have hurt not to have had them at all.

[It isn't just Eren's mind that's a mess. His heart is a miserable tangle of rage and passion, and it isn't just funneled into hatred. He loves violently. It's miserable.

[He hated being alone, but it's how things should be. It's better for everyone that way.

[He knows.

[He clings more tightly to Maruki. It wasn't better for him...

[He doesn't want to talk about it anymore. He couldn't find the words if he tried. He feels like if he opens his mouth he'll vomit.

[So, he just holds on. Eventually, sleep will find them, like it has every other night together. He'll forever be chasing the rest he needs.]

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