[ Thorfinn suppresses so much of his own memory — accidentally, the way trauma works, not through some insane orchestration like someone — in order to keep going. It could really break him, the weight of it all, and he's never going to carry anything like what Eren does.

This place has had the opposite effect, though. He's emotionally much stronger after being here, after making connections to other people — Eren, Loki, Maruki, Dolph — who treated him as a person.

He hits one closed fist against Eren's chest, but there's no weight to it. There could be; Thorfinn is anything but weak. But he's not fighting, just…nudging. ]

Maruki said you'd come back. I thought he was just saying it to try to make me feel better. People tell themselves lies like that.

[ He's heard the way that people talk when they've lost things, when they've lost people, homes, everything, anything. His own self-talk isn't much better, convincing himself he was strong enough to take on Askeladd long before he was. Maybe technically he could be now, if he'd learn to think amidst a fight. If only he'd learn to stop getting pissed off whenever that bastard pushes his buttons. ]

You don't have to lie to me, too. You don't have to tell me you'll stay. It's not up to us.

[ Just like death and war, he thinks. He's used to being used, though he won't see it that way. He's used to a lack of agency, choices made only to survive. He thought this place was different, maybe, but look how that turned out. ]

It's enough that you're here today.