PSL / MEME CONTINUATION

[abandonhumanity]

I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine
and rage the likes of which you would not believe.
If I cannot satisfy the one,
I will indulge the other.

Comments

cw: hard drug use

[abandonhumanity]

((ooc: continued from here))

I'm not dying.

I didn't do it. I said I wouldn't.

[When they fought. When she blocked him.]

[headhooligan]

Good.

[ … ]

What’d you do instead.

[abandonhumanity]

[There's a long pause. Has he fallen asleep again? No...]

Drugs.

[A lame half-response. He doesn't want to say it out loud. He knows how it sounds.]

[headhooligan]

[Ahh.]

Not the usual. [She can’t make it sound like a question.]

[abandonhumanity]

[Even in his severely altered state, beating around the bush is beginning to feel pointless.]

S'heroin.

Sorry.

[headhooligan]

[There is a long,
long,
long,

long, dead silence

before Aubrey so much as thinks of a reply.]

[It hurts.
[Yeah. His problem feels like it’s gutting her. She’s such a good ex like that. Shutting him down for another round and all. Probably pushed him to it. Probably wouldn’t be here if they hadn’t fought. Probably could’ve avoided all this. Probably, probably, probably who the fuck is she kidding.]

[Was the last word ever worth it?]

“Sorry”....

[It’s faint.]

[abandonhumanity]

Yeah.

Sorry.

[...]

It'll be fine, Bow. It'll be fine.

It's just once or twice.

[Four, five times...]

[headhooligan]

Mm.

Don’t…

Don’t say that.
“It’ll be fine.”

[She swallows.]

…

Prove it.

[abandonhumanity]

Okay...? [The irritation is unwarranted; what it actually is is shame, weaponized and pointed in her direction.]

It's not a big deal.

[headhooligan]

[It’s a game they’ve both played before.]

Bullshit.

You know it.

[abandonhumanity]

[...]

It makes me feel better.

[headhooligan]

[An old instinct: That’s my job.]

[Silence, instead.]

[She lets it stay quiet for a few agonizing seconds more. The next words are a mumble—] Be right back. [—followed shortly by (if Eren’s listening closely; not that there’s much other sound) the vehicle pulling to a stop, Aubrey getting out, and slamming the door.]

[It’s less than ten minutes, if even that. More important things to do than indulge a buzzing, fluorescent light with the full extent of The Agonies.]

You’re coming back with me.

[She sounds exhausted.]

[abandonhumanity]

Huh? [It's a startled sound. He really did fall asleep that time. Groggy and slow, his brain tries to put together what exactly she's trying to say. Going back with her?]

Back where? What?

[headhooligan]

Jesus. [The car has not started yet.]

Away from there.

[abandonhumanity]

[...

[Aubrey wants to take him with her? Back home, or?

[He can do that. He can definitely do that. He's been on a bender the last two days, sure, but he'll just enjoy this high and then let it go. Easy. For Aubrey? Easy. If it means getting to be with her? Done.]

Okay. [He can't keep the smile out of his voice. This is a whole new brand of euphoria.] I like that. Yeah.

[headhooligan]

[There. He sounds better now. Wasn’t that easy?]

[The car has not started yet.]

[Aubrey swallows, again. Her throat still burns.]

Okay. [She shuts her eyes.] We’ll do that.

Are… you alone?

BASTARDIZING THE ICON

[abandonhumanity]

[He doesn't answer her question - he's thinking of something else.]

I love you. [His voice is uncharacteristically warm. He doesn't sound unlike a cat purring, his voice breaking off into the groan of a stretch.]

😔

[headhooligan]

[Some putrid blend of instinct and guilt has her answering:] L-love you, too.

[The car is not going to start for a little while. Aubrey folds her arms on the wheel and droops.]

I’ll… be there, soon....

[abandonhumanity]

Yeah...

I wanna see you...Get here fast, okay?

[headhooligan]

I will.

I will.

[abandonhumanity]

Are you crying...?

[He can't tell...It doesn't sound like the car is running.]

[headhooligan]

[It’s quiet for a while. Which is an answer, if he stays awake with it.]

[But the keys turn anyway.]

Like I said… be there soon.

[It’s going to be a long three hours.]

[abandonhumanity]

I'll wait up for you. [He sounds half-asleep already.] Okay, Bow?

[headhooligan]

[She (more-than-)half expects to find him passed out on a sidewalk.]

[A long, measured sigh.

[And then the drive resumes.]

Okay.