abandonhumanity | PSL / MEME CONTINUATION

[insert contact name that may or may not have changed since they stopped dating] calling…
✅ ❌

[It’s still whatever stupid pet name they last used. ~~”Detriment”.~~ Maybe someting like “Personalized Headache 💕”. See, the emoji means they were still pretending it was a joke.]

[She picks up immediately.]

[Her name in Eren's phone has been "Bow Girl 💗💗" since they met (the hearts were just added later, you see - and never removed).

[When she answers the phone, she'll hear a party before she hears Eren's voice; in fact, someone yelling, "Where the hell are you going, Jaeger?"

[Eren yells back, drunk, not minding that his mouth is by the receiver:]

Mind your damn business.

[Now, to Aubrey:]

Hey, you. Say something. I wanna hear your voice.

[His speech is slurred. It's a bit flat - has been the last couple of years, but it's not too bad drunk, nor with Aubrey on the other end of the phone.]

[Eren probably can’t hear over the party, but Aubrey’s already moving. While he yells back, a door shuts (his voice drowns it out even on her end), and his speech to her is punctuated by the clipped shut of a car. It’s not on yet, though.]

Something. [Trying to sound disinterested. They both know that never lasts.] Where the hell are you? [Like that! See? Plenty irritated and he’s only said three sentences.]

My boyfriend's throwing a party.

[Floch Forster is not Eren's boyfriend, but Aubrey doesn't need to know that yet. He hopes it digs into her a little bit first. She's probably (?) one of those "I'd never help you cheat" sort of people; the idea that he could cheat on that guy is a little bit hilarious to him. Floch wishes.]

You're coming, right?

[For the record, he's outside now too, and the din of the party is no longer in the background of this conversation.]

Edited 2023-10-02 15:53 (UTC)

[Boyfriend. Dig, set, match; Aubrey’s not too sure which guy it might be this round, but she really does hate hearing he’s ~~replaced her~~ dating someone else. She tells herself it’s because he’s still hooked on her, and that’s not healthy for him and blablabla.]

[She wouldn’t help him cheat on purpose.]

[Anyway—] What’s the address. [—that’s not a yes. But he’s drunk, and he’ll need a sober ride. Somehow she ~~hopes~~ doubts the boyfriend is gonna provide.]

Edited 2023-10-02 16:26 (UTC)

[The way she's not asking about Eren's not-boyfriend both pleases and stings. Doesn't she care? Well, she's only acting like she doesn't care, which means she does care, which means the dig worked, but did it really if she's not even going to throw him a bone about it?

[The second he sees her, he's kissing her like he's just gotten home from war.]

One sec.

[Location drop sent.]

I'll even pay for your gas.

Hey. Aubrey.

[He just likes saying her name. Aubrey, Aubrey, Aubrey. His heart is pounding in his chest, because tonight, in just a few hours, he'll see her face in person.]

Miss you, Bow.

[—Wait. Wait, is that—?]

Floch fucking Forster?! [Aubrey barks a laugh; it’s a spiteful noise.] That’s a new low.

[Is it, though? Long before Eren first* drove his fist through drywall (*that Aubrey was there for, anyway), just looking at Forster made her want to eat glass. She’s still dead certain he and his goonies are at least 90% responsible for turning her boyfriend into a nuke-’em-all-lunatic, and it’s definitely not because it’s easier to blame a distant jackass than look Eren in the face and see what he always was.]

[Guess he’s not so distant anymore, though, huh.]

[Aubrey is so goddamn incensed she barely notices the old pet name. (Barely, but not not at all.) She thinks if she drives like this she’ll mow down the nearest pedestrian, on purpose, stroller and all. Eren will hear her fist on the dashboard with a decisive thud, like she’s trying to break it.]

Fuck you. [She’s still laughing.] Stay there and rot.

[That THUD is a little alarming. Aubrey's reaction makes him smile, because of course it does - this is the anger he was looking for, and he doesn't mind at all that it's in Floch's direction; however, if she's angry enough that she might not show up, that's no good. His smile fades when he considers that.

[He forces a drunken snicker, if only to match her livid laughter. Is the car engine on? He can't tell.]

Come the fuck on, Aubrey. Don't be stupid. Like I'd ever date Floch. Fuck him, yeah. Date him? I still have some self-respect left.

I was kidding.

[Alright, enough laughing. Eren knows he got her. Not allowed.]

[Aubrey turns the key with prejudice. It is a janky, shitty sound from a stuttering wad of metal that’s several months past its expiration date; it had a shitton of miles in the first place and they just keep stacking. Trips like this don’t help. Truly the best money could (and still can) buy.]

Every day you find a new way to disappoint me. [She’s trying to sound nonplussed again. It’s a better attempt, if only because she’s too embarrassed by the catch to fire back immediately.] I wouldn’t put it past you. [Not these days....]

[He can hear the engine rattle to life. Thank God. His heart warms even as his irritation rises. He'll see her, he'll see her, he'll see her again soon. It's been too long (only a week or two - far too long).

["Every day you find a new way to disappoint me."

[That cuts him deep. He doesn't show it...He's never told her with any degree of honesty how those particular words make him feel.

[His mom would be disappointed in him too. He's positive of that. It weighs on his heart every single day.]

You don't know shit. [There's no real animosity to his tone. He just sounds drunk.]

I wouldn't give him the satisfaction. Stupid prick. I'm only staying with him because I got kicked out of my apartment.

[A little snort at that. It's funny, see? The last time Aubrey saw him, he was still there.]

[In the tragedy of the century, Aubrey only briefly notices that Eren didn’t have much else to say back (a hint, maybe, if she thought about it), and then he’s talking about Forster again. And like, fuck that guy. Fuck that guy so hard.]

[The phone is deposited unceremoniously in the nearest cupholder. It will rattle like a bitch the entire drive, even when the roads stop being hot pothole-ridden garbage, but Eren should be used to it by now—or, well, “should,” in Aubrey’s opinion. Since he insists on these calls.]

Ha ha, very funny. [Something tells her Eren’s not kidding but like, entertain the thought.] You just said you have some self-respect left.

[He "insists" on them. "pinky promise???"

[At her disbelief, Eren snorts again, but it's a bit more humorless than the last. He's not exactly happy about that entire situation; he won't admit its his fault, of course. Landlords are fucking parasites and deserve to have their lives threatened. It's fine.]

I'm not kidding.

I got evicted, so I needed somewhere to go. Piece of shit landlord - lives two states away in a million dollar McMansion. I bet he really gets off on robbing poor people of their housing after doubling their rent so he can afford his next trip to Cabo.

Maybe I really should kill him.

[He might have a harassment lawsuit pending. Anyway!]

Floch and Yelena are my friends. Sorry that you can't stand that. They gave me somewhere to go just like they always have.

[The story has Aubrey eyerolling—not because she doesn’t believe it, but because she absolutely does, and of course he would. Of course! He doesn’t even need to sound serious about the death threat for her to know he made one, maybe several. That’s Eren Jaeger for you.]

[The disappointment comment wasn’t supposed to be serious, either. Come on.]

[Anyway, every word of his topic change is a chunk of ice down Aubrey’s shirt. She won’t give him the satisfaction of laughing again, but her reply drips venom.]

“Just like they always have”… [Like. Ow. Okay. Way to remind her she was almost always going over Eren’s house, for (depressing) reasons he knows damn well about (because they’re depressing).] If you were sorry you’d be staying literally anywhere else.

[And where was Aubrey after they broke up? ~~Driving to his house several times a month to talk him off the roof and hold him until he felt like he could live in this cruel world another day, just so long as Aubrey was still a part of it.~~

[He picks absently at the grass growing out of the cracks in the sidewalk. He sounds like someone who is engaged in this activity - idle and casual, still drunk as all hell, brain foggy.]

Sorry for what?

[Well, yes. She is absolutely pissy because she’s jealous, and not because she would’ve offered her own place in a stupid, regret-inducing heartbeat. Which is its own jealousy, but. Always easier to get mad at the third party.]

Sorry about your culty-ass “friends.” [Aubrey is also aware they were… around… for Eren, in a way she still refuses to be. Still not gonna get all gung-ho about mailing people bombs, sorry; got tired of pretending to understand that a looong time ago.] Bet they won’t even hold your hair back when you’re puking your guts out tomorrow.

I'm not sorry about my "culty-ass friends," so. That would explain why you aren't getting an apology.

[He yawns into the receiver.]

Yelena always holds my hair back, but it doesn't matter anyway since you can't stay away from me.

[Towing the line...]

[Yawning, huh? He’s either fucking with her again or genuinely tired. The latter is an unfortunate thought; she’s not driving all this way to find out he’s gone to bed.

[So, with great reluctance, Aubrey will entertain the line. There’s a pause, though. He knows her too well for “I could turn around right now” to be anything but a joke.]

[After a slow, rolling stop:] Hm. Yeah? [Visibility’s shit at this hour.] What else does Yelena do for you?

[Begging for an onslaught. It should invigorate him, though.]

What's that supposed to mean?

[He sounds...invigorated. :)

[He's smirking into his phone.]

Don't tell me you're jealous.

[Oh, of course he’s gonna make her elaborate. Mission accomplished failishly....]

Alright. [Too defiantly to be convincing,] Then I won’t.

I think you're forgetting something, Bow.

It’s not supposed to mean anything. I can ask.

I'm only interested in one girl.

You may have met her. Insecure type?

[Had to get that little dig in there.]

Edited 2023-10-08 06:35 (UTC)

Ha ha, very funny.

Maybe I want to hear Yelena’s treating you right, actually. [So I can one-up her—] So you can move on.

Yeah, well. That's never gonna happen.

[The good humor isn't gone from his tone, but there is, as always, a hint of sadness that comes with that sentiment.]

Don't act like I'm the only one, either. You coming or what?

[It's a tease. He knows she's only been in the car a few minutes.]

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